Alchemy

Alex and I have purchased premade sandwiches at little grocery stores we've found over here - it's a cheap way to get a few meals that will last all day - very handy when you're having a day made up entirely of travel. Yesterday was one of the stereotypical travel days. We wake up in Paris, and are due in northern Netherlands by the evening. So we get up at 9:00, pack up our things, and make it to our train from Paris to Brussels that leaves at 11:00. Around 12:30 we're in Brussels, and since we left a thing or two at our wonderful host home in Brussels, we're stopping by their house to pick them up. A quick errand, then it's back to the train station, where we take a 3 hour train to Amsterdam. But our host in the Netherlands is closer to where Skylar lives, so we take a 2.5 hour train from Amsterdam north to get to Leeuwarden.

The journey from Amsterdam to Leeuwarden requires a connection to be made in Amersfoort, so about 40 minutes after leaving Amsterdam we switch platforms and trains. Once on that train, we're expecting to rest the rest of the 2 hours until we arrive in Leeuwarden. But about 45 minutes later that train stops, and an announcement comes over the intercom saying that this train would be staying here, and we'd have to move to a different train to continue on to Leeuwarden for the evening. More shifting.

Finally, we arrive in Leeuwarden, where we then have to find a bus to a specific stop to find our host for the evening.

Honestly, folks, this is a stereotypical travel day for us. We've been doing this thing for almost a month now, and it really is beginning to feel just like a day in the life. Get up early, pack our things. Catch our first train, expect to make a few connections along the way as we traverse the continent to our next destination. You get used to carrying around your big backpack in the tight spaces and the narrow hallways that trains have. You get used to lifting them over your head to shove them into the compartments over the seat. You get used to shifting your things around to get what you need for the train ride out of your bag (in my case: food we purchased at the little grocery shop in the train station, journal, bible, pen, and sometimes iPod; for Alex it's his iTouch, our food, and sometimes his journal).

But there were a couple changes to the stereotypical plan that made yesterday's all day train travel really miserable for me.

First of all, I noticed in Paris that my big backpack has begun to rip. There's the part of the backpack that goes around the waist, and it's meant to carry all of the weight (the shoulder straps are really more for stability rather than meaning to be the weight-bearing part). But somehow, something caught on the plastic part that keeps one of those waist straps in position, and has sliced right through it nearly 85% of the way. Fortunately, the waist straps still serve their purpose when it's on and I'm strapped in, but when it's off, the waist strap moves about independently, usually causing it to rip a little bit more. (Good news: I think it will last me through the rest of the trip, especially once we add some duct tape to the situation. The bad news: This makes putting on and taking off the backpack a little bit more tricky, especially in all those tight spaces upon trains that I mentioned. And it makes the straps in general a bit more fragile.)

Second, do you remember those premade sandwiches I mentioned earlier? We first discovered them in the UK. They have quite an array of choices, and really, they're top notch quality. Nick's friend Jacqueline first introduced us to the concept when we were at Windsor Castle and we stopped at an M&S for lunch. We've enjoyed this type of meal a number of times in the last month, and at one point I even had a salmon sandwich! A strange concept, but it was actually quite tasty.

So yesterday we're in one of the many train stations, with a few minutes before our next train departs. We wisely use this time to validate my new rail pass and grab some food. Alex grabbed his favourite, the BLT, and a Club sandwich. I couldn't really find much (since it's not even in English) that looked familiar, but then I noticed another Club sandwich, and the interesting salmon sandwich I had enjoyed a couple weeks previously.

A tidbit of information on Alex and I. Before we left home, I was having a discussion with my mom about Alex and I saving money while on this trip. Flippantly I made the comment, "We'll just eat once a day and sleep on trains," to which my mom wisely replied, "Now remember, your brother is bigger than you and eats a lot. Make sure to let him eat." Except Mom, I've been meaning to tell you: Since we've been over here, Alex hasn't been as hungry as we might think. It's your daughter that wants to eat every couple hours, and even though we've just had a full meal at McDonalds, half an hour later she's still craving bread, cheese, chocolate, something else to snack on. (I think our host in Paris thought there was something wrong with me.)

So it's no surprise that while Alex can wait, and desires to make his food last a little bit longer; as soon as we sit down on the train, I'm hungry. I dive into my salmon sandwich, and enjoy a bit of the baguette we purchased with some cheese. Ahh, sweet satisfaction.

But about an hour later, we're not even close to reaching our destination. We have multiple trains and legs of travel ahead of us, and I don't feel well. By the time we're on the first train from Amsterdam to the Netherlands, I'm starting to wonder if I'm going to get to enjoy the 'culprit', that salmon sandwich, a second time, and in reverse. And then I feel so terrible that I'm actually hoping to regurgitate it so it will be out of my system.

At this point, I'm just plain unhappy to be where I am. I'm tired of carrying my broken backpack around, I'm tired of running with mere minutes to catch our next train with this broken backpack, and a stomach that is threatening to murder me if I keep trying to run, regardless of what good reasoning I have to do so. I'm tired of feeling nauseous, being jostled by the train during my nausea, and being locked out of one of the bathrooms on one of the trains. All I want to do is lay down, and stop being on trains, or buses, or waiting at metro stations. I just want to feel better, and everything about my current situation is preventing that from happening.

I've been reading the beginning of the Old Testament lately. I've always been pretty interested in the story of the Israelites going from Egypt, through the wilderness, into the Promise Land. In print, to spend 40 years in the desert/wilderness is just a number, but to really consider spending 40 years wandering in a place you can't call home, that's gotta be frustrating. But the story demonstrates to us that sometimes such a period is necessary in order to get to where you really want to be. There's an aspect to the journey, to the wilderness, that's meant to teach us a thing or two about the type of person we're becoming. One of the reasons for the wilderness for the Israelites was to teach them about how to live as God's people, so that when they came into their blessing, when they received the life they'd been dreaming about in the midst of their slavery, that they would know how to truly appreciate and experience this blessing. (Very "new wine, and needing to turn the old wineskins into new wineskins" kind of thing.)

Who's read the Alchemist? Great book. Talk to Alex about this book, and he will forever sing its praises. I'm a big fan myself. Alchemy is the process of turning ordinary things into gold, and the story is all about a boy finding this 'treasure' he's dreamt about, and the journey he takes/gets taken on in order to discover it. But like any wisdom of the ages, the book is quick to point out that any journey worth taking, while the universe will anxiously assist anyone attempting to pursue their passion/achieve their destiny/take a worthwhile journey or pilgrimmage, that doesn't mean such days will be completely without struggle, disappointment, frustration, set-backs. It's absolutely true that we should just accept that the days where you feel like crap and you're wondering what this whole thing is for - these days will happen. They are unavoidable. But  most of all, they are necessary. They are a crucial part of the journey. Not only do they help us appreciate to a greater degree the good days, and the simple things, like being able to sit down, the joy of connecting with a dear friend, a warm shower and a hot meal, the ability to sleep horizontally instead of vertically, etc...

...but they help to augment a change occuring deep within us, teaching us something about the type of person we're meant to be. It is truly a blessing that life doesn't just hand us the gifts and dreams that we so deeply crave, but first teaches us how to be the type of people that can really enjoy and appreciate our much desired gifts and dreams.

And when you think about it, even the miserable parts bring about something really great and helpful, just as vomiting all last night helped me to rid the problematic sandwich from my being. Let's be honest, after I was done, I did feel much better, and was even thankful to be throwing up, despite how painful and unpleasant such an act is, because I knew that it was absolutely necessary for me to feel better.

That being said, even the days such as yesterday make the journey worthwhile, as they teach us something about ourselves, they help us to learn valuable lessons, and they help us to shed layers and habits and toxins that might otherwise stay in our system, our lives, our habits, etc. Because whether it's this pilgrimmage, or life in general, the point of a journey is not merely to arrive. Arriving is only possible once the trek is made, and the answers usually aren't found unless the process of getting to them has been endured. The journey is just as much a part of arriving as actually arriving, and it is important we remember its necessity. We are experiencing growth on the journey that makes us ready for what we're arriving to...not to mention in the days of struggle the days without struggle are that much sweeter, and more appreciated.

"For I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us." -Romans 8:18