Be brave. Breathe.

Life is not always easy.

No matter how old or young we are, weathered or sheltered, broken or whole, trudging or flying, wise or naive, brave or fearful, rich or poor, foreign or local, conservative or liberal, black, white, or anything in between, you, the reader, already know that this is true.

Sometimes life is really hard.

Sometimes we've been hurt by someone, whether the situation at hand is a breakup, divorce, someone lied/deceived us, a form of abuse, cruelty, neglect, persecution, judgment, or a misunderstanding gone awry.

Sometimes struggles happen that are out of anyone's control. Perhaps someone dies, and we get left behind; perhaps someone gets sick, a natural disaster occurs, there's an accident, the opportunity goes to someone else, plans and timing don't go the way we wish they would, etc. Perhaps the time is defined as boredom, angst, despair, alienation, or we simply have to wait.

Perhaps the struggle lasts a few days. Perhaps it carries on into months and even years. The nature of the struggle is that it often defines itself as it transpires.

When the struggles come, I've found we often wish we could sleep through them, fast-forward to the good parts, time travel to when the waiting was worthwhile and paid off - because it is the waiting through the struggle that seems so hard. It is living in the day to day that seems to prove time can slow down and drag by, as we wait for the promise tomorrow brings, or we hope it brings.

In a way it would be nice to sleep through the days/months/years of struggle, simply to wake up when the hard part is over. In the fairy tales, Snow White or Sleeping Beauty slept through the tough parts of the story. Of course we all cringed when we watched them eat the poison apple or touch the cursed spindle, but when facing a pain in this life that you must simply "endure" or "wait it out," I'll be the first to admit that sleeping through it seems like a choice I'd be happy to give a try. Hand me that poison apple or cursed spindle and let me wake up when this thing is all over. After all, I do like a good, long nap. When you awaken, the world will be as it should, the waiting will be over, and that handsome prince, (Mattel, the creators of the modern fairy tale 'Barbie,' would call him 'Ken'), will wake me up and tell me that while I've been sleeping he defeated the proverbial dragon.

I've always liked philosophy. My favorite is Existentialism. The existentialists are brilliant and strong; they discuss the nature of living and the nature of existence, and what it means to exist. These guys don't just pass the time, they really live, and they challenge us to do the same. They challenge us to really exist, and to make our breaths count. They pursue what it means to live a meaningful and fulfilled existence.

They emerged and wrote during periods in history when struggle was happening on national and global fronts, when the question of what made a meaningful life had to be answered. The days they were facing were far from easy, but rather filled with trial, pain, misery, loss, and many, many questions.

In times when so many were letting the despair of the times cause them to crumble, the existentialists were fighting an internal battle, defining for each moment a meaningfulness to life, in their own way. They were seeking how to live passionately and sincerely, in the midst of obstacles, distractions, and tribulations that could lead the individual to simply sit through today, only living for the coming of tomorrow.

I think I love them so much because I admire their bravery. They fight for purpose and don't shrink back when life deals them a tough hand.

It's a brave thing, to breathe.

It is a brave thing, to live, facing the struggle, the conflict, the pain, the trial, and to face it head on.

It is a brave thing, to breathe, despite all the circumstances that could potentially convince you it's not worth it.

Perhaps it would be easier to sleep, to let go, to give up, to run away, to stop caring, to fall away.

But...

to stay awake,

to press in,

to hold on,

to wait patiently,

to keep fighting, 

to continue loving,

to stick around,

to continue caring,

to remain passionate,

to pursue meaning in the struggle,

to continue living,

to keep walking,

...despite all the terrible things that lie ahead on the path - that is profound bravery.

But why should we carry on? 

Why not? 

Who are you to say tomorrow can't be beautiful? 

Your hands are quite capable of change, and there are plenty of people in this world that need to be helped, inspired, encouraged, fed, comforted, kept company, appreciated, valued, clothed, visited, nurtured, and loved.

It is often in our struggles that we learn better how to care for others, that we often learn traits such as empathy and compassion for one another, on levels deeper and greater than before we knew what it meant to struggle and suffer.

Besides, when the days seem long and unbearable...

Keep in mind that today is only 24 hours long, and tomorrow hold tremendous promise.

Keep in mind that these storms never last forever.  Harriet Beecher Stowe once said, "When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you, till it seems as though you could not hang on a minute longer, never give up then, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn." 

Keep in mind that dawn in coming, and surely fast approaches. 

Robert Frost reminds us, "In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on."

Keep in mind that even the most trying of times are made a little more bearable when there's someone around to hold your hand, and weather the storm with you. 

And if all that isn't good enough for you, keep this is mind: 

You, I, all of us, have been through struggle. 

We've been through some sort of pain, suffering, misery, confusion, doubt, disbelief, etc - and we're now here, reading this, writing this, enduring this - surviving. 

Keep in mind that while breathing takes profound bravery in times such as these, it is so worthwhile.

I take strength from the existentialists, because regardless of what they define as meaningful, they all rise above struggle, live in the midst of it, and pursue meaning in spite of whatever pain they may be enduring.

But that's the beauty of the existentialists. They may define meaning in different ways, but they all, in the beauty of the movement, ask the questions and press into life. It matters not so much about the specific answers they each came to find. But the beauty is that their struggle is our struggle, and we are each called to determine what it is that makes our days worth living, as Kierkegaard said, "...to find the idea for which I can live and die."

When I say survive, I mean your heart can carry on. I mean the loss/grief/confusion/struggle you may be dealing with doesn't have to break you. Doesn't have to mean that you'll be in pain and struggle forever. 

Often in literature and movies, rain is an archetype for change. 

It may be raining in your life, and life may be changing. 

But it's certainly not ending. 

Today, you're still alive, still breathing, and you can do something with those breaths. 

I don't know what it is, that's for you to figure out. 

I have my own meaning to find, my own trials and battles to fight, to breathe through, to win. 

But the point is: your existence is not without purpose, and the fact that you're still breathing in the midst of and beyond the trial, beyond the loss, during the pain means you still very much have something to give. 

You still have 

something to offer, 

something to create, 

people to inspire, 

books to read, 

movies to watch, 

things to learn, 

miles/kilometers to travel,

adventures to have, 

countries to visit, 

people to meet, 

hands to shake and hold, 

lives to change and make better, 

smiles to cause, 

laughter to share, 

joy to be had and found, 

things to be discovered...

You still have a life to be lived. 

So be brave, fellow human. Breathe, and continue living.   

For this life, this trial, this struggle is only meaningless if you say it is. 

"Listen as your day unfolds

Challenge what the future holds

Try and keep your head up to the sky

Lovers they may cause you tears

Go ahead, release your fears

Stand up and be counted

Don't be ashamed to cry."

-Des'ree 

 "For I consider that our present sufferings 
are not worth comparing 
with the glory that will be revealed in us."
-Romans 8:18

  

"You desire to know the art of living, my friend? 

It is contained in one phrase: make use of suffering." 

- Henri-Frederic Amiel 

"Life is meaningless only if we allow it to be. Each of us has the power to give life meaning, to make our time and our bodies and our words into instruments of love and hope." 
- Tom Head